Overwhelmed - This is how I feel in the run-up to therapy
Georgia*, a psychology student, explores, as she calls it, her 'unwanted stuff', using art as an outlet. Something she has been using occasionally in her Therapy sessions.
This is how I feel most weeks in the run-up to therapy. There’s just so much going on in my head, heart and environment that I have no idea where to begin so just freeze up.
Divorce, illness, job hunt, kid issues, mum issues, family conflict, studying, house renovations, email, stuff in therapy, loss, grief, HUUUUGE amounts of stress, abandonment, rejection (abandonment and rejection are not the same things). Loneliness, constant arguments between my parts (with my wise adult slipping further and further away), so that it just seems impossible to talk to her and I wish sometimes we could just sit together and do nothing or go for a walk or colour.
I sent this to my Therapist on Saturday. She’s yet to respond which is unusual for her and is setting off my unwanted stuff. I wonder if she’s changed her personal boundaries. Where once she used to respond on a weekend, now she has decided she won’t? Which would be completely understandable, I’m always surprised when she does… would just be nice to know if that is what she’s decided to do so I know what I can expect from her.
Maybe she’s getting me used to not emailing? Maybe she’s trying out the whole ‘not responding’ thing we spoke about? That upsets me because we hadn’t agreed to anything. It seems unfair to do that without telling me when she’s so far been desperate to work together as a team on this. Unless she’s ill, or worse… or someone close is ill or worse. But that’s unlikely… so… URGH. Anyway, before my anxiety kicks off I’m moving on!
*Georgia has used her online pseudonym for this article.
We would always encourage people to discuss any concerns they may have in relation to therapy session agreements with their therapist.
Author's Bio
In Georgia's own words she is "a 33 year old im-mature student in my 2nd year of a Psychology BSc with the Open Uni. I hope to go into Counselling Psychology before I get too old! I'm in on-going psychotherapy with a cracking and awesome therapist who often uses art therapy with me. So I use this in my own self-care and blog about my creative genius (or lack of!)."
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